Dear Halloween,

Hey, thanks for the great times yesterday. I sure did have fun. But, I think that you make things sorta slutty sometimes. You let girls dress up skanky and you allow body parts to hang from all sorts of places, ya know? And you make it possible for a whole dance floor to smell like sweaty butt. You were a ton funner when I was 6.

Thanks for the great times and letdowns,
-Me